Sarita Scales’ book Surviving My Generational Curse: Never Let People Define You is a deeply personal narrative of survival, healing, and self-empowerment. In this memoir, Sarita offers readers a raw, unfiltered look into her life—one defined by the emotional abuse she endured growing up in a household dominated by her undiagnosed narcissistic mother. Now semi-retired, with a career spanning finance and real estate, Sarita reflects on her tumultuous childhood and the life lessons she’s learned along the way. This compelling story speaks to the strength of resilience, the power of self-reclamation, and the necessity of breaking free from generational patterns of dysfunction. Readers can find it on Amazon.
The Dark Reality Behind Closed Doors
Sarita’s early life was far from the idealized childhood many envision. Outwardly, her mother presented herself as the perfect hostess—a woman who embodied grace and charm in public. But when the doors closed and the visitors were gone, her mother’s true nature was revealed. Sarita refers to her mother as “The Pretender,” someone who maintained an immaculate public image while terrorizing her family behind the scenes. Sarita and her father were the primary victims of her mother’s emotional and physical abuse.
In the home where love and protection should have been abundant, Sarita instead encountered hostility, name-calling, and sometimes violent outbursts. These episodes were not fleeting moments of anger; they would last for hours, leaving the family in a state of constant fear. For years, Sarita and her father lived in a house filled with chaos and emotional turmoil, where the normalcy of family life was replaced by relentless dysfunction. Her mother, consumed by a need for control, ruled with cruelty and manipulation, ensuring that Sarita’s childhood would be shaped by trauma rather than nurture.
Navigating a World of Betrayal
Despite the dysfunction at home, Sarita always longed for the support and protection that family is supposed to provide. However, betrayal became a recurring theme in her life. The people who should have had her best interests at heart—the very individuals she trusted the most—turned out to be unreliable. Sarita’s trust was repeatedly broken, and this sense of betrayal only deepened her feelings of isolation. Instead of the warmth and safety of family bonds, Sarita was left to fend for herself, navigating the emotional minefield of her toxic upbringing.
But as Sarita grew older, she realized that she could not allow the betrayals she experienced to define her. She had to find a way to stand on her own, to cultivate her own identity separate from the negative influences that had surrounded her for so long. Sarita learned to cope by developing resilience. She built a metaphorical armor around herself, learning to move past each betrayal without letting it destroy her sense of self-worth. Over time, she began to see that her value did not depend on the approval of others, but rather on her own ability to rise above the hurt.
Confronting Family Secrets and Finding Healing
One of the most striking aspects of Sarita’s memoir is her willingness to confront the difficult truths about her family. In writing Surviving My Generational Curse, Sarita uncovers long-buried secrets and exposes the hidden reality of life under her mother’s influence. The façade that her mother worked so hard to maintain crumbled under the weight of Sarita’s honest reflections. Through this process, she not only faced the painful memories of her childhood but also came to terms with the damage that had been inflicted upon her siblings.
Her mother’s narcissism left scars on every member of the family. Sarita’s father, a gentle man who was also a victim of the emotional abuse, was powerless to stop the constant attacks. Her siblings, too, struggled under the weight of their mother’s manipulation, though each of them coped in their own ways. For Sarita, the act of uncovering these family secrets was a necessary step toward healing. It allowed her to process the pain and finally begin to rebuild the parts of herself that had been shattered by years of trauma.
A Story of Resilience and Reclamation
At the heart of Surviving My Generational Curse is a message of hope. Sarita’s story is one of resilience—an unrelenting determination to rise above the circumstances that could have easily defined her life. She speaks openly about the many challenges she faced, including the long road to reclaiming her sense of self. Writing this book was a pivotal part of her healing journey. It gave her the opportunity to confront her past, find her voice, and, most importantly, rewrite her narrative.
In doing so, Sarita discovered that healing is not a linear process. There were moments of doubt and despair, times when she felt lost and unsure of how to move forward. But through reflection, perseverance, and self-love, she emerged stronger. Her story is a testament to the fact that no matter how difficult life’s circumstances may be, we all have the power to take control of our futures. We are not defined by the pain we endure, but by how we choose to overcome it.
Empowerment Through Storytelling
Sarita’s decision to share her story was not only a way to heal herself but also to inspire others. Through her writing, she hopes to reach those who may feel trapped by their own generational curses—individuals who, like her, have struggled to break free from the toxic patterns passed down through their families. Her message is clear: you are not defined by your past. You have the power to reclaim your life, to step into your own identity, and to live for yourself, not for the approval of others.
In Surviving My Generational Curse, Sarita offers a roadmap for anyone seeking to heal from emotional trauma. Her story is one of courage, resilience, and, above all, empowerment. By sharing her journey, Sarita has turned her suffering into a beacon of hope for others, reminding us all that we have the strength to break free from the chains that bind us.
We had the privilege of interviewing Sarita Scales. Here are excerpts from the interview:
Hi Sarita, It’s great to have you with us today! Please share about yourself with our readers.
Hi, I am semi-retired, and I have worked for years in the finance and real estate field. I have three adult children and two granddaughters.
Please tell us about your book, Surviving My Generational Curse.
The book is about my journey being raised by a mother who was an undiagnosed Narcissistic person. Who tried to control her family’s lives. In front of others, she was the perfect Host until the company left and the door closed. The Pretender (as I call her) was released, and depending on the visit, the encounters were violent with bloodshed, name-calling, and cursing, and could last for hours. It was a scary situation. However, this became our everyday life. No one came to our defense. My father and I were her main victims. I never expected my Mother would be my worst enemy. She was hell-bent on destroying my life. This lasted until she passed away at the age of 97 years old.
Please share your journey with our readers.
I had to grow up being in the survival mode all the time. The streets raised me because my parents were busy in their own lives, just fighting to care about their children. Never stopping to think about the effects this created on their children. Imagine I had to breathe, eat, and sleep in this environment. Eventually, it becomes engrained in your soul.
What are the strategies that helped you become successful in your journey?
It was not until I had a near-death experience in 2023 that all my suppressed memories began flowing out. While trying to recover from this traumatic event, I realized these negative thoughts were preventing me from healing. At the suggestion of my Therapist, I started writing. At first, it was rough to realize all the signs I had ignored. I blamed myself for being blinded by all of this. I knew now, years ago, I should have separated myself from this family. And knew, I was trying to run from the problem that followed me like a shadow. I was masking the issue with drugs, alcohol, and sex and that none of these had cured what was inside. I had to make a difference and rely on my own understanding and belief. I had to understand every step I took was being ordered by God. Even writing this book and telling my story needed to come out in the light. Too many families want to keep the secrets inside the family. But, they never take into account the mental damage the secrets are causing. My family ignored everything. By believing in God and knowing my Guardian Angels were protecting me, this allowed me to survive.
Any message for our readers?
Always believe in you. Let you define who you are. Trust in your instincts!
Thank you so much, Sarita, for giving us your precious time! We wish you all the best for your journey ahead!
